Violent Thunder

It's quiet.
It's dark.
I feel alone
...and deeply sad.
The words: "He's gone." boom through my heart and head
...like violent thunder.
I feel those rumblings all throughout my body...this is excruciating.

What is Dada?

This was not intended to be "pretty art." During my thought process, this painting was supposed to be "ugly." I tried really hard to create something using Surrealistic characteristics. At this time, I just can't seem to wrap my brain around it. It was taking a lot of brain power. I decided to explore a bit of Dadaism. In my research, I discovered that Dada was kind of a "Anti-everything" movement...perhaps even "anti-art"?

My dad is dying of lung cancer and last night, I realized, I may never talk with my dad again. My day was filled with tears and sadness. All I could think of was, "Cancer? HOW DARE YOU!?"

This piece started of with a child-like mixed media composition. The sky was painted red because red is the color of love. I love my dad. Red is also a color for grabbing attention. I painted the sun and hills in typically symbolic colors. I used a magic marker to draw in stick figures. One larger was to be the daddy and the smaller figure a girl child. The figures were flying a kite. This was a memory I recalled while working on this piece. When I had that picture the way I wanted it, I ruined it by slopping black randomly over the picture. Black represents cancer. I had to use a hair dryer for this piece. The paint was thick. When it was as dry as I could get it without spending the entire day drying the painting, I painted the words. The mis-spelling of the word cancer serves a dual purpose: One purpose is this entire painting was to have a child's perspective as I feel quite small, helpless and powerless (like a child) today. A small child might spell this word phonetically. The second purpose is  I want to insult cancer with this art.I know that when my daughter finds her name spelled incorrectly, she is insulted.

I see this mixed media art as a bit of a cross of Dadaism with the offensive language and Expressionism with the intense emotional messages both verbal and non-verbal.

**When I first created this blog, I wanted it to only be for happy and positive things. Well, it just so happens that I am a divine being having a human experience. Humans were graced with a full range of emotions. I happen to be the lucky owner of just such a set. This process of my dad's cancer diagnosis and losing my dad has shed a very different light on so many aspects in my life. I think differently about so much. I like this new light. I just wish it hadn't come with such a hefty price tag.